Inside the puddingland

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MySpace Graphics Your kiss spins like a dice in the night air and finds a shelter in the naked geometry of my face. - For R

Thursday, October 1, 2009

An evening in mercury

- For B

(A sequel to 'Parting at Park Street')


you’re standing by the window;

you hear
the soft breath of the city
entangled in winter mist

inhale the silence
inside the heart of the swollen river,

and feel the pulse
of the broken sky
throb with flickering thoughts

as the city slides
on fragments
between a poem
and sleep


what are the women doing
in the rain?

draped in thunder
and songs,

as my fingers
lick the silence,
exploring the ruins
of her sari

why does the bed
smell of lost lovers?


nights of prayers
and sweat,

as we exchanged glances
in the taxi on the VIP

talking in fits and starts
or polite whispers

and you kept complaining
that it was getting late
but the traffic kept us waiting

your thoughts in a dream
and the rim of your skirt
on my naked toes,

I savoured every second
of the uneasy silence


rain girl,
it’s been nine winters

since I left you standing alone
at the crossroads
in Park Street

and I have lost your touch
inside the catacombs
of this fragile city

I always expected
one last letter,
but I never really bothered
to look for it


dance of the moon
in the embrace of the river,

the bridge swings
in tension with secrets

the night once again
talks of uncertainties

as lonely streets
drunk with mercury lamps
recede in the mirror

and melt
in the voyeur of smoke

I succumb
to the meaning
of touch


staring through the blinds,
you strain to detect
the last traces of sound

those sad evanescent whispers
from sleepy apartments
as stars sulk on the horizon

one by one
you count the lights,
as they go out

inside the ebony spaces
of this dead city

and you know
it’s your turn now


deepteshpoetry said...

For my friends,

Chk out Quince's new blog.

zorlone said...

Another excellent poem Deep! Looks like you have submitted yourself to Rain Girl's mercy because you left the decision up to her.

I wonder what she will say and what will happen next. You just kept this hanging again. he he he.

At least that's a good thing, I'll just be thinking of my own version of their love story.

Will come back for more. I guess the University keeps you busy these days.


Somewhere Circus said...

Man. Deeptesh. Stop Making Quince Proud!

Srayan said...

well Deeps it looks lyk d parting just made a lotta things reveal........thots dat cherish in our m1nd after sum1 really D3aR goes away 2 make us feel solitary........and almost leave us to silent tears....stanza five was really touching and awsum and d best in d poem......
i hope dis parting will conitnue untill one day they meet again mayb when dey r too old to cherish their sweet memories but still look into each otrs eyes and say "I always beleived in my belief of d Return oF mY LosT LoVe"

sreemoyee said...

da power of luv has been captured in ur portry...keep up...

Reeju says... said...

'i succumbed to the meaning of touch' easily you wrote something so complex as far the emotion involved!!!! looking forward to raingirl's also reflects the immense love and passion that brings out such emotions...let there be love!!!

Ed Adams said...

Hey, thanks for stopping by. Thought I'd do the same.

Nice poetry.

SandyCarlson said...

I really enjoyed this. It spoke to me as one who had trouble sleeping over the past several nights. The solitude, the yearning, the love were real and evocative.

ishani said...

i think i should stop commenting on ur poetry, because u have matured enough, and outgrown us all by now :). but i'd love to read some more.

Anne said...

This is gorgeous poetry! You paint beautiful images! I love "the rim of your skirt on my naked toes"-I can feel that!

Thanks for visiting my blog. I look forward to more of your wonderful words!

Amrita said...

beautiful..heart-rending..touching..n would be an under statement to say that u write well...but do try writing bout sumthin lighter next about our jheelpar addas..the tone in ur poetry is always v sombre..make it a bit more happy..

Subham said...

Hey Deeptesh..its been long that i made my last visit here...and what a poem to come back with...I loved made me feel at times I cudnt stop to read thru the lines...This is awesome yaar..Keep going...I am proud to be ur friend buddy...

carissajaded said...

Thanks for the comment and the nice words! I enjoy your poetry as well!

Jena Isle said...

Mysterious and titillating. A unique way of presentation, way to go!

floreta said...

this is pretty cool deeptesth. i can definitely sense a somber feel throughout.. a disconnect between two people. miscommunications and missteps.

Revived Angel... said...

This is the first tym i've cum across ur blog.Truly touching..espcly the lines.."Rain hs been nine winters..".Beautiful.Jst 1 word for it.Beautiful.

De Wolf said...

this is was fabulous....the "b" is a lucky one...

Deeptesh said...

@ zorlone

Well, it is more about the tension between the poet n the rain girl an the pendulum keeps swinging in this monologue.....whether I should continue I dunno...may be it's best left looks complete but it is a fragment!

@ Quince

Ur blog will floor us all!

@ Srayan

Looks like this story has really moved u dude!And u keep getting better in English!

@ Sreemoyee

I'm glad if the poem has betrayed signs of true feelings!

@ Reeju

Ah! Will there be a reply....or will this remain a fragment?I don't know.Depends on what people want.I'm unbiased right now.

@ Ed Adams

Cheers mate!Hope u come back again.

@ Sandy Carlson

I'm glad that it made an impression!But the rain girl is the one in the poem who suffers from insomnia.

@ Ishani

Rubbish!Your comments mean a lot to me!And u r one of my favourite poets!

@ Anne

Sensuous, ain't it?Hope 2 hear more from u.

@ Amrita

OH....I'm already thinking...let's c....I'll try 2 write something about 'jheeling' then!

@ Subham

Thanks...welcome back old pal!Hope 2 hear more from you.

@ carissajaded

Thank u so much!

@ Jena Isle

Aw!Luv the way u look at it!Thanks!I'm glad u r back...

@ floreta

So glad u found time to visit me!Have a nice time in Florida!

@ Revived Angel

I'm flattered!Thank U!!

@ De Wolf

I'm so glad.n 'B" is happy too, I should think.Will have a talk at the uni.

sayani said...

very beautiful and touchy poem..........
keep it up princy......

(srayan's sis)

Swastika said...

great work deeptesh.....the words r very realistic...keep it up and hope to expect more such master peices from you...

siras said...

I think this part was even more beautiful

Deeptesh said...

@ sayani

Thank u.I'm glad u visited me.What a nice surprise!!

@ Swastika

Thank u...

@ siras

thanks.I'm glad u r back!!

"Sunshine" said...

From part 4:

"I always expected
one last letter,
but I never really bothered
to look for it"

I like these lines because I think most people have experienced them in some way, at some point in their lives. Sort of wanting to hang on to the past, but not wanting to make much of a effort to regain it, knowing that it is, indeed, passed.

Also, great ending.

Jm Benavidez Estoque said...

your poems are simple but yet very creative and nice! :)

rajdeep bhattacharya said...


Deeptesh said...

@ Sunshine

Ah!Nice that u could relate.n so glad to have u back!!

@ Jm

thanks.I've been working on simplicity of late.....

@ Rajdeep Bhattacharya


Trisha said...

nice! :D

Deeptesh said...

@ Trisha


Anonymous said...

I really love the first section of this! very beautiful! I'm sensing someone's in love? I'm so happy for you! you desrve the best my friend! hows school going?

Anonymous said...

ps- this is larissa :)

bARE-eYED sUN said...


this one very, very good.

we sense a more sophisticated tone,
a more economic way with words yet more complexity at once.

kudos! my friend,
keep on bloggin'


sujaan said...

really nice; loved the succumbing to the meaning of touch...

and also...

I always expected
one last letter,
but I never really bothered
to look for it

Marja said...

Great imagery and very touching wow great poem deeptesh

Deeptesh said...

@ Larissa

Thank u so much!I'm so glad u r back n blogging once again!

@ ero

You're spot on.I'm working on economy of expressions n making each word work Caroll once suggested.

@ Sujaan

Thanks....looking forward 2 meeting u.

@ Marja

I'm glad!Always such a pleasure to hear from u!

Americanising Desi said...

i am so sorry that i took this long to come in here AGAIN!

the poem i s as usually fabtastic!
you love the tease dont you cuz i sense a lot of it in your words :)

but then you give me a chance to give my rotten imagination a chance to fill in :)

thanks for brining me in here

Deeptesh said...

@ AD

So glad that u r back.n I absolutely luv 2 hear from u....such a great pleasure!

atindriyo said...

Tomar lekha shundor

windless said...

I liked it more than the earlier ones, diptesh. the linguistic metaphors of silence are strong, but once again it rings too much of four is darker and much more can think of going beyond the Romantic second person and even Eliot's subversive use of it as in LET US GO THEN YOU AND I and so on...what about a calmer third person, may be?... there is a greater poetic suspension at work, here but i would still like to pare down, make the thing more Keats says, poetry lies in that 'fine excess'. u can seriously engage with the poems of Sylvia Plath, Carl Sandburg, Samuel Beckett and even the Surrealists/Verticalists...Your poetry can become lighter and more profound...reach that Unbearable Lightness of Joyce, the artist behind the work is always paring down the fingernails...ALL THE VERY BEST...GO AHEAD...WAITING FOR UR NEXT POST...

Beloved Haiku Dreams said...

My friend I am sorry it took me so long to get to your web page. I have been ill in hospital.
Your work is wonderful as I can see that others feel as I do.
I will return to read more.


Deeptesh said...

@ atindriyo

thanks a lot!

@ windless

Thanks.I'll try 2 read all of them.But I'm still a UG-1 student!There will be time, there will be time.But I always luv ur incisive comments.


Thank u so much!I'm so sorry to hear u were in a hospital.Hope u r doing better now!