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1. Reflection
A red roseon the mirrorwet with a symphonybeneath the falling rhymeI have seensilent fluid-filled spaceselectric rivers,silent white wingsflapping in darknesstravelling against timein an age of miracleswhat haunts you thenwhen you timidly exploreyour ownreflection?
2.The City of Mirrors-1-In the city of mirrorsthe streets shimmerwith pale blue propheciesand demon poetswalk slowly with candlesin a confused silenceamong the ruinsof voicesand dead cinemas-2-Beneath the metallic skythe capsule moon may revealfrozen lovers,lost in timeor actorsrehearsing their sex roles,amidst an enchantedforestwith smells of charmed liquids-3-In the city of mirrorsyou may find magic womenpractising alchemyor fortune-tellersstaring hard at their ownreflectionswith guns and memories-4-Here every reflectiontricks the eyeand tempts youwith a sinister gameof the sensesand every word spokenis coatedin a blue mistof telepathyor psychic cries-5-Sometimes,as lightening-strikes numbthe tentacles of the cityand darkness fades in a holy trance,to reveal signs of shockor horrorblood-stains on the wallor on an ancient rhymemight tell,you've travelled back in time-6-In the city of mirrorsevery vain game ends in failureand deathand as you runthrough the blinding light,every street looks the samein a maze of reflectionsuntil the mirrors dazzle your sights and senses,as if to say:here you all are prisoners of painyou may come only onceand never go back again
62 comments:
Addendum
I must honestly confess that when I first wrote this piece,there was only the second part 'The city of mirrors'.The first past was added as an afterthought influenced by Beethoven's symphonies.Both the parts are capable of being independent pieces,but have been blended together to emphasize the concept of travelling backwards in time where music acts as a vehicle or as we call in science-fiction, the Time-Machine.
i am always lost in another world when i read your stuff!
i dunno what you do with it but you do it madly!
very mystic. its like painting a new world with words.
this new world is fascinating.
Beautiful pieces deeptesh!
I will be following your poems from now on. Good luck with the woof contest! I'm sure you submitted one for the April 17 deadline too.
Z
Which one? can you tell me the title? you may want to look at the story i made. I entered it to an online writing contest. If you like it, then vote for me.
I would really appreciate that dude.
Title: Blog to the world: blog for you and me
@labels it is under Lainy's blogoversary
Will link you to my blog in a while. do come visit and we shall talk about poetry some more.
Z
I love these lines:
'and demon poets
walk slowly with candles
in a confused silence
among the ruins
of voices
and dead cinemas'
I like how you've arranged these poems into sections, making up one larger piece. It works really well.
I'll have a poem up tonight for the Poetry Train.
Enchanting words, Deeptesh. Interesting look at self and time-travel. Hope all is well with you. Have a nice day.
I liked the demon poet part.
But, yet again, I find an uncanny similarity of few usage.
hi there. i rarely find poems that i really like, but yours are good. :) keep on writing. i'm not kidding! :P
don't ever stop writing.
really.
I love your interpretation of mirrors.
Hey hey hey.....
Creepy one...i was imagining it actually.
And good luck with that contest! Woof!! Hope you win it.
Very interesting. The works seem to build in power as you go from part to part. You create vivid poetry, Deeptesh.
oh wow. beautiful.
i don't know why, but this conjures imagery that reminds me of the movie Sin City. i'm sure that's not what you were going for.. awesome that you were inspired by Beethovens Symphonies! I quite like hearing about your process.. You are seriously perhaps my favorite poet (!)... I admit I don't read a lot of poetry literature. So my poetry comes from.. 'nothing'. I echo everyone else here... "keep writing".
this was an interesting read !! the lines "what haunts you..." they will definitely leave a mark on every reader !!
Loved your attitude- 'R U Deepteshified'; 'DREAMS OF THE LAST LION' etc.
And this piece about the other world full of mysticism reminds me of a beautiful song by 'The Eagles' - Hotel California
Good work!!
Got to be following you from today onwards..
@ seher
I love to fiddle madly with words to create another world.It's surreal but not unreal.
@ ishani
I did use a lot of imageries to create this new world, esp in the first part.
@ zorlone
Yeah, I meant my first poem.I'll visit u and read more from you.I love to talk to people about poetry.U can mail me if u like.
@ Julia Smith
There's an occult imagery in there.I arranged my poem into sections only as an afterthought as I said in the addendum.Hoping 2 c ur poem soon.
@ Michelle Johnson
Thank you.I'm doing well.Hope u r fine.
@ Debs
Thanks.Ironically I wanted 2 remove that part while editing but it has been a good hit!
@ the girl in stiletto
Thanks for visiting n appreciating me.Really nice of u!
@ Chase
Thanks.I have to write for I live to write n write to live.
@ songofsea
Creepy for sure!!!N forgot 2 tell almost....I didn't take part in Woof this time.I'll, may be next time.
@ Bryan
Thank you.Interesting idea there! Nice that u visited me.
@ ChinkyGirLMeL
Thank u sooo much!!!Nice 2 have u here.
@ floreta
No, I didn't watch that movie.That is a great compliment to get.I think you should read more poems for if u can write such awesome poems from 'nothing', then think what u can do if u start reading famous poems!
@ Pretty Me!!
Yeah, let's hope the lines haunt my readers as well.
@ sudharm baxi
Last Lion is an anagram.Can u figure it out?Great parallel there.....Hotel California is one of my favourites as well.And thanks for the following!!
Yeah, the mirrors do it for me...
Cleverly done!!
This really picks up, for me from 4.
It's like lucid dreaming!!
A marvellous reflection of an other world.
City of mirrors, thats my pick. Lovely ones here
Deeptesh, this is awe inspiring poetry. This is the first time I've visited your site - I'll be back for more.
sorry, we wish we could give you a quick comment and be done with it, but, alas we cannot.
this piece is haunting (which usually means good) and dense.
we're gonna need to copy/paste/print and reread several times in order to give a proper comment.
for the moment we can only say that at a quick glance this piece is nothing short of brilliant.
but, we don't wanna get carried away, do we?
we're gonna read it some more.
thanks for sharing,
p.s. we never want to reread our own verse, as a matter of fact we prefer to forget. :-)
..
.ero
Hey
thank you for checking out my blog. Your poetry is very vivid, you have a lot of talent.
Such vivid and intriguing imagery...you took me to another place. Just beautiful!
oh...i've read one of floreta's poems just today and now yours..i think im going to be seriously reading poetry from now on...nice...it's really nice..
@ STG
Yeah, I did pick up the tempo towards the end.It is dreamy after all.
@ anthonynorth
Profound thinking there.
@ Jeeves
Thanks
@ keithsramblings
Thank you!!U r welcome to visit and comment as many times as u like.
@ bARE-eYED sUN
Thank you!!Poems do reveal newer meanings on re-reading.U r welcome to read this again, go in deeper and comment again and again.
@ Nana
Thank u!!I'll re-check your blog when I have time.
@ Fledging Poet
Good to hear I was able to take u to another place with my imagery!!!!
@ Ella
Thank you.Poetry is always enjoyable.I haven't seen floreta's last poem....I'll do it right away.
Suppose time travel would be possible some day in future!
Pablo Neruda rewritten
"In the city of mirrors
the streets shimmer
with pale blue prophecies
and demon poets
walk slowly with candles
in a confused silence
among the ruins
of voices
and dead cinemas"
Deep:
Had to read this one a couple of times before commenting. Even after the second reading, the above lines stood out of my absolute favorites. I agree with Julia on that.
Love the concept of streets shimmering with the prophecies--it works well with the mirror metaphor/motif. Additionally, I appreciate the juxtaposition of ancient ruins with modern cinemas. Very nice imagery, once again.
Thanx for droppin by mine.. Interesting poem.. Jus rockin.. Keep up the good work.. stay in touch.. tak care..
G'Day thanks for visiting me and commenting. That poem is magical.
i like the idea of merging the two pieces together...gives a teleport kind of a feeling...
the whole thing is truly magical (as many have already said)
i loved this line :
as lightening-strikes numb
the tentacles of the city
:) keep writing
@ gautami tripathy
Wow, that would be real fun.We need better scientists I suppose.
@ Sunshine
Thanks.Glad that u read it more than once as newer meanings surface on re-reading.Good to hear you like my imageries.The juxtaposition was an experiment.....I had tried out more of it in Helen-in memoriam.
@ Sriram
Thanks mate!Your posts rock as well.
@ linda may
Thank you!Hope u visit me again.
@ sujaan
As you may have seen, I said that I put the first part in as an afterthought.Gautami was saying if time travel would ever be possible.Wonder what someone like u feels on that.I mean the sci-fi element in this.
your writings are amazing...the words are incredibly beautiful.
where do you find such inspiration for your writing? its nice to read something like this especially when creativity is so hard to find these days. I felt like I could feel, see, touch the images you painted. very nice. :D
@ Larissa
Thank u very much for dropping by and your nice comment.My words and images actually get formed magically.....it's the Poetic Muse as I have so often said.And I like building up powerful imageries that appeal to all our sensual perceptions.
'the streets shimmer
with pale blue prophecies
and demon poets
walk slowly with candles
in a confused silence'
I liked these lines a lot deep...
So , i find you are writing a lot these days...how are you?? sorry , i am keeping myself a bit busy as well as a bit upset these days...unfortunately , i didn't qualify in the pre-medical exams...now , i am looking forward to crack the law entrance exams...please do wish me luck...
and please forgive me for commenting so late...
Keep writing!!!
Wishing you good luck!!!
Sourik
@ Sourik
Funny how many people loved the imagery in those lines.I have a poem on spirituality as well....chk it out when u come over next time.I'm not writing a lot...just finished two poems after my board exams.Sorry to hear you didn't qualify for PMT.....no need to be upset.I'm sure u will do well in your coming exams.Thanks for finding time to see my poem...my blessings are with u always.
Certainly food for thought...
Awesome blog!
I will read your beautiful poetry in peace later, and then comment. But I can already make out you write beautiful. Will be back later. :)
Beautifully put! (:
Thanks for visiting my blog!
@ Gypsy at heart
I really wanna make everyone think.
@ Siras
Thank you.You are welcome to visit me again and comment as you like.
@ Komal
Thank you very much!
Deeptesh,
Still working on your latest poem? I can't wait to see it. hehehe.
Good luck with that dude. I am currently looking for a cheap or free copyright protection for my blog. I know someone who was plagiarised.
Z
WOW!
You've got one helluva gift there cowboy!
Why, we'd be mighty pleased to have you join us on Poetry Friday.
Okay, seriously...
Beautiful use of language and imagery. I also am a musician and artist - isn't it amazing how colour, form, sound, passages, and light affect our use of language.
BRAVO! applause...
just send me a poem by next Friday...a txt file is perfect (I can't guarantee special formatting)
and include you name and web addy...
I can't wait!
blessings,
julia
All of your poems are really awesome... They are surely worth reading.
@ zorlone
Well,I'm not thinking about my next poem now....Sometimes my poems take a long time to come.the lines just get formed magically and unless that I happens I never start writing.The best part is I don't know when those lines will come.
@ Julia Ward
Thank u.Count me in then.And it amazes me as well how intricately literature,painting and music are woven together.Fine arts at the highest level is very much the same in all streams.
@ sushreyapal
Thanks for dropping by n ur lovely comment!
Nice blog Deeptesh :)
You're being blogrolled :P
Wow...thanks.I just visited your blog and left a comment.
astoundingly abstract! i m dumbfounded - spell bounded.
so unreal - yet so magically real.
brilliant!
You are blog-rolled!
This is by far one of my favorite poems so far. I am sorry I didn't come sooner but I have a job and I have been working a lot of hours lately. Great work
since u asked, although physics doesn't disprove the possibility of time travel, i do not think it's possible to achieve it
"In the city of mirrors
the streets shimmer
with pale blue prophecies
and demon poets
walk slowly with candles
in a confused silence
among the ruins
of voices
and dead cinemas"
Hey, Deeptesh! Your sense of imagery is marvellous. Your words flow like waves of a deep sea and make the readers delve deep in search of hidden secrets. You have beautifully put mirrors and candles to put a contrast. Reflections in those vitreous streets can become illusive yet real. I feel inspired to write a poem. Thanks for visiting my blog and leaving your nice comments..
I adore your talents! Great piece and it's so deep for me that I could hardly fathom... you're a real poet.
Congratulations and keep up the great works, Deeptesh!
@ ABHISEKH SiM
Thanks mate.Yeah, abstraction is my newest fascination.I'm visiting u right away!
@ J Scott
Thank u.It's great that u found time in your busy schedule to drop by my blog once again.It's highly appreciated!
@ sujaan
Wow....I thought you'd admit that it's a distant possibility in the near future.The relativistic concept.....may be?
@ Saima Afreen
Well, it's an eerie combination to evoke the sense of surrealism.Glad that u visited me.I'm happy to be an inspiration for a poem....would love to read it!
@ WebbieLady
Thanks again for visiting me.Love your compliments. :-)
Wow!tht was simply beautiful!!U write really well.
Deeptesh,
Congratulations for making it to the top five in the poetry category of the WOOF contest!
Z
@ Ria
Thanks.Glad u visited me.
@ zorlone
Thank u friend!Congrats to u as well for making it to the top!
Hi DT,
You're just 19 and you write such beautiful poetry. Doc Z has to watch out his back....lol..just kidding.
I voted for you because you deserve to win. Congrats for winning at WOOF.
Keep writing.
@ Jena Isle
Thanks for visiting me n also voting for me!I'm glad u did it.And I'm 18....I'll turn 19 this July.
This poem of yours is beautiful in a heartbreaking way. It is as if you are speaking of a fantasy world seen through a broken mirror. This piece can't be put under a label.
I, as always, remain a true fan of your poetry.
- Piali
A ballad...a journey is felt...the garden of winding, if not forking paths, a la Borges...but, u could have gone beyond the typical nostalgia of the lost city...have u read Calvino's Invisible Cities? if not, read it n u will understand what I thought was missing in this otherwise well-crafted poem...keep it up...ARKA CHATTOPADHYAY
Red rose wet with symphony?
Tht line evokes you to read thru' the poem...again and again and....yet again! :)
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